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The way people treat you says more about them than it does about you
While a lot of people automatically associate bullying with school playgrounds, sadly this is not always the case. Bullying can occur in all walks of life, in families, amongst ‘friends’, in relationships, social groups, and social media. It can also occur in education, the work place, care facilities, large corporations, professional & governing bodies, politics and mainstream media.
Bullying can be directed at an individual, a specific group or an entire population.
Bullying may include many different behaviours including ignoring, intimidating, mocking, humiliating, shaming, jeering, demeaning, labelling and ostracising. It may also include moral harassment, sexual harassment, slander, aggression, threats, different levels of punishments, mental and physical abuse, isolation and abandonment.
In the work place and professional life there may also be the destruction of reputation and career, stripping of finances and professional funding, unjust removal from professional associations and boards, license suspension or revocation, censorship, serious threats and worse.
There are many different reasons for bullying but there is often a deep inner fear, insecurity, jealousy, unhappiness or ‘lack’ which is driving the desperate need to control and be ‘top dog’. Bullies are never strong no matter how they try to appear. The person may gain a sense of power and may feel stronger when they put others down or cause them suffering and pain. This is re-inforced when others are too afraid to stand up to them, no matter what they really think, so the bully thinks that they have people on their side when they usually don’t. The person may have even been bullied themselves or have narcissistic or other tendencies. They will often pick on someone who is different from the crowd, perceived as a threat, or make the mistake of presuming that someone who is ‘too nice’ is weak and therefore an easy target.
They may also choose to bully online instead of in person so that people cannot easily find out their true identity. In this way they can reach more people giving them a greater sense of power. However, do be aware that A1 and bots may also be used for this specific purpose
In the workplace bullying can also be used to try to force someone out. This may be from professional jealousy, the person being seen as a threat or another person after their job. It may also be due to internal politics or the avoidance of having to pay out legal redundancies. An example of this is the famous legal case brought against France Telecom for institutional moral harassment when they tried to force thousands of employees out of their jobs. In 2007- 2010 there were multiple suicides and attempted suicides following the extreme tactics they used. This landmark case involving prison sentences was finally concluded on 21st January, 2025 and has set a new legal precedent in France.
When bullying goes so far as to include bribery, deception, coercion, serious threats and aggression, chaos and division in society, the loss of free speech, the attempted silencing of counter narratives and worse, and is used as an excuse to bring in heavy censorship, mass surveillance, and extreme measures of control, you can be sure that the reasons are nefarious, as history clearly shows. There are many instances when various regimes have used these tactics along with fear to bring in an agenda. Once freedom is lost it it never given back. It is at times like this that it is extremely important to listen to your own intuition and feelings rather than to brush them off and blindly follow ‘the herd’.
Fear that they will be the next ‘victim’, fear of what others may think, fear of retaliation, loss of job, loss of professional career and reputation, loss of finances and professional funding. Another reason may be that they are personally involved.
Bullying can often bring feelings of helplessness , depression, fear, severe stress and anxiety, sleeping problems, lack of self worth, self-blame, social withdrawal, a loss of interest in activities, health issues, self-harming and even suicidal thoughts.
In the case of bullying in relationships, the person may be too afraid to leave, particularly if extreme threats have been made, or afraid that they will not be able to support themselves or afraid of being alone. In families the person may feel compromised about standing up for themselves in order to keep the peace and protect others. They may be afraid to leave a job or career as there is no-one else to feed the family. This can cause huge inner conflict with their conscience if they are aware that unethical policies or agendas are at play. They may feel afraid to speak out if families and friends have been threatened or blackmail is involved. Bullying has many different levels of severity and the deeper the level the more severe the consequences of speaking out can be.
The elderly, children and people in care can also be subjected to bullying but are often too afraid to speak out as they are vulnerable and often dependent on the perpetrators. This can have an enormous psychological effect on the person and their health. It is important to be aware of this and be aware if someone seems ill at ease, compromised or afraid.
When we are born and throughout our childhood we are extremely vulnerable and dependent for far longer than other species, normally we would not be able to survive for very long by ourselves.. We are therefore hardwired from birth to stay with the ‘herd’ for our own survival which is dependent on us being accepted. Back in tribal life banishment from the group would almost certainly have meant our demise. This is why in tribes the ultimate punishment is humiliation and shaming followed by ostracisation and abandonment . Interestingly this is still put into practise today when people are put into solitary confinement as severe punishment in jail.
Hypnotherapy can offer you invaluable support, it can also help you to see the situation from a different perspective, which can be extremely empowering. A bully will often try to turn you in against yourself, while hypnotherapy will teach you how to stay on your own side. It is paramount at times like this to develop a strong relationship with yourself, a deep inner confidence and belief in yourself, it is one of the most important things you can ever learn.. Hypnotherapy can help you manage stress, anxiety, fear, depression and the other effects you are experiencing. It can also offer you one of the deepest relaxations known to mankind. It is at times such as this that it is also important to prioritise self-care and spending time out in Nature whenever you can.
There are many different ways of dealing with bullying according to the individual situation.
It is often through life’s challenges that we evolve and grow and realise that we are far stronger than we think.
There is no need to suffer alone.
This blog is part of a trilogy. Please see ‘Can you be hypnotised without your conscious awareness’ and ‘Betrayal’
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Mind Harmony does not offer medical or psychological advice, nor diagnose, treat or prevent any disease. The information shared by Mind Harmony is not intended to diagnose, treat or prevent any disease. The content of Mind Harmony is that of a holistic, complementary and alternative therapist and opinions, advice, recommendations and sessions do not constitute the medical advice of a doctor/physician. I am here to support you and help you achieve your goals with warmth, empathy, understanding and total confidentiality.