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Betrayal can have a devastating effect. It can destroy our trust, our beliefs and affect every aspect of our lives. If we didn’t see it coming it can leave us in shock and disbelief, doubting ourselves. The effects can be enormous physically, mentally and emotionally.
The betrayal may come from a ‘friend‘, a partner, family, an individual, or a group. It may occur in our private, professional or social lives. It can also occur in education, care and health facilities or on social media. Although people often think that betrayal comes from someone you know, sadly this is not always the case. Betrayal can also come from large corporations & industries, financial, professional and governing bodies, politics and mainstream media & in every walk of life.
Betrayal can be directed at an individual, a specific group or an entire population.
There are nearly always lies, deception, fabrication, breaking of confidentiality and demeaning. There may be infidelity, slander, humiliation and abandonment. The perpetrator will often show one face to the betrayed while showing quite another one behind their back. They may become so skilled that they can carry this deception on for years without being discovered, they are often a master of disguise. For example many people in the public eye spend vast amounts of money with PR companies to change their public image from an unfavourable one to a whole new identity. In some cases this is done so successfully that their new identity is quickly adopted by the public, forgetting their past. Such is the power of the media and programming.
The betrayer may use fraud, bribery, embezzlement, the destruction of careers and reputations, harassment, mental physical or sexual abuse, gaslighting, blackmail, secrecy, threats, violence and even worse to get what they want. On a large scale there may be years of meticulous planning, research and large sums of money involved. The perpetrator will often accuse others of deeds which in fact they themselves are guilty of. They can be extremely convincing, particularly if they have narcissistic or psychopathic tendencies and often announce what they are going to do in advance. An example of this is the Yorkshire ripper who managed to close down the whole of Leeds and the surrounding areas one Friday afternoon when he announced his next murder . He was described unknowingly by one lady as such a ‘kind’ man.
The Betrayer will often have little respect, if not complete contempt, for those they betray. In fact they often blame the betrayed for their own actions. They may even claim that their actions are done to look after or protect their ‘victims’, particularly in abuse, or for the ‘good’ of their health, safety and well-being, while sadly the truth is often vastly different.
There may often be a change in their behaviour, for instance they may avoid the person they are betraying or become more distant. They may seem more awkward around them, seem pre-occupied or ill at ease. There may be a change in routine, they may find an excuse to be absent whenever they can. They may become meticulous in covering their tracks.
The perpetrator may have complete contempt for the law and believe they are above it, often manipulating facts and evidence for their own agenda. They may also dictate to others certain behaviours while refusing to comply themselves, believing that there is one rule for them and another for everyone else. They often believe in their own superiority.
When the betrayal is ‘en masse’ there will nearly always be FEAR used as a method of control, propaganda, the control of the media and the censorship of counter narratives. When these are used in combination with the loss of free speech, mass surveillance and extreme measure of control you can be sure that the reasons are nefarious. You only have to look at the methods used by extreme regimes in other parts of the world and in history itself. Once freedom is taken it is rarely given back.
The main reason is ‘because they think they can‘. There are also many other reasons for betrayal which may include unhappiness (particularly in a relationship), insecurity, jealousy, ‘lack’, greed and fear. It can often be for financial, personal or professional gain. It can also be used to gain power and control. This is particularly the case if the perpetrator feels that someone or something is a threat or in their way. When deception is used there is nearly always something to hide.
Deception may be used by governing bodies to bring in policies and protocols that the public would otherwise reject. Industries may use deception in the description and contents of their products along with their marketing claims. Deception may be used to get into a powerful position. It can also be used to cover up crime.
A denial of responsibility is often used, for example just ‘following orders’ (used in the Nuremberg Trial) or ‘we are not paid for that, it is not our concern’ (an answer given by a scientist when asked if they ever think of the consequences of what they do). However as one famous scientist said, ‘just because we can, does not mean that we should’. N.B. These are paraphrased.
The betrayer may believe they will not be found out or are oblivious to the consequences if they are. This is particularly the case if they feel that there are sufficient people on the same agenda as themselves with enough power and money to feel relatively secure in what they do. But the truth always eventually comes out. They may have a sense of grandeur and entitlement to whatever they want. They may also have narcistic or psychopathique tendencies.
It is important to also remember that someone may betray others if their family, careers, funding, reputation or lives are badly threatened. Conversely if they are bribed with vast amounts of money they will betray whoever is seen to be in their way.
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One of the most frequent reasons is the belief that ‘he, she or they would never do that‘. This is the belief that because someone would never do something themselves it means others wouldn’t. This is far from actual reality, neither is it taking into account the affect circumstances can have as the following clearly shows:
‘The Milgram Experiment’ at Yale University, which began on 7th August, 1961, set out to measure the willingness of the participants to obey an authoritative figure’s orders and perform acts which conflicted with their beliefs. Unknown to them the subject experimented on was in fact an actor. However, despite the hesitancy of some, the vast majority were prepared to use the punishment of electric shocks for an incorrect answer to a question, as instructed. The electric shocks that were used, if they had been real, could have been fatal. The experiment was to ascertain the psychology of the obedience to authority and the psychology of genocide and was set up in connection with the ‘Nuremberg Trial’. WARNING: caution should be used if watching the video as it is not suitable for children and some people may find it distressing.
It can also be that the person may not want to believe the deception as they know that the shock would be too much for them to deal with, particularly if they are already dealing with anxiety, depression or other challenges in life. However, the deception does not go away. There are also those who find it incredibly difficult to admit when they are wrong, so will stand by their beliefs no matter what, even if there is plenty of evidence to prove otherwise, if you know where to look. To get down to the truth of any situation it is always important to start by looking at the evidence on both sides with an open mind, as you would in a court of law. Then there are those who were brought up to trust and respect authority and certain organisations without question, without taking into account that as people change in organisations so does their agenda. It doesn’t take much for infiltrators to be immersed in the right places to ensure change, as proudly announced by a contemporary public figure.
Personal life experience has also a large part to play. If someone has had a relatively smooth sailing life with little experience of deception or betrayal they are unlikely to be so aware of what others are capable of doing when they have different morals and a lack of integrity. However, you only have to look back at the last world war to see. Then there are people who are either so busy that they won’t make the time to look or are completely unaware of a situation which may affect their whole lives and those of their children. There are also those that watch mainstream media or read the newspapers who are totally unaware of who finances the media and controls what is shown. There is also the effect of the repetition of ideas and slogans on the subconscious mind. There are also those who are aware when something doesn’t feel quite right but prefer to turn to reassurance out of FEAR, unaware of the deception. However, sometimes it is the perpetrator who is themselves offering the reassurance and help. As was the case of the Yorkshire Ripper offering to walk one of the people in his neighbourhood home at night so she would be safe from the Ripper. Another case was Dr Shipton who was convicted of the multiple murders of his patients in the year 2000.
There are often certain phrases used which are warning signs such as ‘for the greater good’ or ‘we are all in this together’ covertly introducing the idea of being a ‘good’ citizen. They are repeated over and over again and are often used for social control in different regimes. These ideas are used expressly to target members of society who like to do good, not only for others but for society and the planet. However, the truth of what is really being done may be vastly different from ‘good’, and the reality of us ‘all being in it together’ couldn’t be further from the truth when there is one rule for one and another for others, right in front of our eyes.
People often feel there is nothing they can do when facing betrayal ‘en masse’ and feel totally disempowered. However, nothing is further from the truth. One person is like a grain of sand, together people can make a shore. You are more powerful than you will ever know.
Betrayal can have a devastating effect. It can cause extreme shock, stress, anxiety, depression, anger, a sudden loss of self-belief, sleep problems, self-blame, PTSD, fear, helplessness, withdrawal from society and even detachment. The person may even go through ‘The Dark Night Of The Soul’ when the whole foundation of their beliefs and their entire existence comes crashing down at a soul level. It can feel as if there is absolutely nothing and no-one left they can trust, they can feel completely destroyed. In Buddhism they call it ‘falling into the pit of the void’. Betrayal may also affect their finances, emotions, future relationships, family and the very foundation of their whole lives. It can also affect their health.
The person may feel highly anxious as the subconscious mind, which is there to protect them, will be on red alert with the rational that if they missed the warning signs of the betrayal, what else did they miss. Looking back there are often red flags, that made them feel uneasy or the feeling that something didn’t seem quite right. They may well have brushed the feelings off and put them down to something else or reassured themselves that everything was fine. Conversely there may have been no warning signs that they were aware of and it might have come totally out of the blue.
Hypnotherapy can empower you by helping you to become free of any disempowering feelings of being a ‘victim’ and help you to establish a really good, strong relationship with yourself . It is paramount to always stay on your own side in life and be there for yourself through it’s challenges. Hypnotherapy can help you to see the situation from a different perspective which can make an enormous difference. It can also help you with feelings of self-doubt, self-blame, anger, helplessness, loss of confidence and feelings of overwhelm and defeat. It can help you with the feelings of stress, anxiety and fear and enable you to deeply relax so that you can sleep. Hypnotherapy can also help and support you through any decisions you may have to make. It can help you to trust yourself again. You will also be given a highly individualised re-programming recording to support you and establish the suggestions introduced in hypnosis. Self-care is a high priority at times like this, as well as spending time out in nature. As devastating as betrayal can be, it can very importantly sort out who is true and who is false in your life and offer an opportunity for growth and renewal.
Please see ‘Can you be hypnotised without your conscious awareness’ and ‘bullying’ which are part of this trilogy
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Mind Harmony does not offer medical or psychological advice, nor diagnose, treat or prevent any disease. The information shared by Mind Harmony is not intended to diagnose, treat or prevent any disease. The content of Mind Harmony is that of a holistic, complementary and alternative therapist and opinions, advice, recommendations and sessions do not constitute the medical advice of a doctor/physician. I am here to support you and help you achieve your goals with warmth, empathy, understanding and total confidentiality.